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Homesick

NYC to Harrisburg to Philadelphia to San Francisco to Napa Valley and back to San Francisco to Charlotte and then Charleston all in 5 days. I'm a little bit homesick. And not home until next week.

ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOMENTS...

EVER ... is happening right now! ... it is the October, slow and steady, clanky-clank sound when the building finally turns on the heat.

The pipes were ice cold 5 minutes ago and now they are searing hot! It smells like burnt dust. I love pre-war NYC apartments!

This warmth and clank clank will be my friend until the dawn of spring.

THANKSGIVING!

It's Canadian Thanksgiving and I wish I was in Toronto! It's funny how "home" changed for me on Friday morning. I am now a US citizen and proud to be, but this privilege defines me differently. I am no longer a Canadian living in the US. I am a US citizen!

I am the only US citizen of my family and I feel black-sheep unique; and a little bit alone.

Tonight, my sister's dining room table is brimming with friends and family and food and I am sitting here in New York thinking about it all.

It's hard for me to define "home" right now.

BUSY TIME

Someone asked me today if I was sad helping with a wedding that wasn't my own... the greatest thing lately is my friends wedding; not ever my own... we are all rock stars!



















































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FAVORITE

I love my iPhone. I was a latecomer in getting one. I purchased it last April as I sadly gave up my very antique cell phone. It was a bitter sweet day.

I am now listening to Beethoven's piano concerto #2 in B flat major as my iPhone evaluates the sound levels of my apartment. It is coordinating the best route to Napa Valley and downloading the "crush" schedule at all wineries I am interested in visiting. It has star coordinates for the evening from my kitchen window and it is explaining the pollen count for tonight and tomorrow in all 6 of the cities I care about most. It just asked me what I want for dinner ...

tonight I am tinkering with a new blackberry that I got through my job. What an inferior piece of equipment. It has brick breaker. SO now I have 2 devices. I contemplated velcro-ing the 2 together to appear like 1. NOPE. I cannot offend my Iphone by doing so.

I now have 2 devices. like 2 children. I am going to play favorites this time

here is the picture of the ugly duckling I just took with my iPhone...











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CUPCAKES FOR LUNCH

I had more fun at CRUMBS bakery today with a one year old than I did all week! Going to CRUMBS is a sensory experience for me; let alone a toddler!

CURRENT QUESTIONS

• define "riff"
• will my window box flowers make it
• can I answer my "current questions" from the past
• if not, what does that mean
• why don't my answers match
• why did I pick yellow
• but chose blue
• why do I wear Ipod buds in the opposite ear
• why didn't I go to Vet school
• why do I wake up at night and ask myself where I went
• why did it take me so long to get an iPhone
• why did that feeling of hearing an amazing song stop me
• did I get stopped
• or lost
• where did I go
• define "the riff"
• can I hear the sun
• or is it just heat
• should I reach out further
• how far can I reach

FAR

LET'S START AT THE VERY BEGINNING....

... A VERY GOOD PLACE TO START















































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changes

i can't sleep tonight for so many reasons. It begins with the 367 days since Dexter. I miss him and know with much certainty that he would have loved my new apartment. His ashes are in a wee urn on my book case. I love that they are there, but if I stare at the urn, I cry. I am human and he was feline, and we were soul mates for 19 years.

it's a new dawn, it's a new day....

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IT'S A GIRL!

My sister is having a GIRL!

I can't wait to be an Aunt!

11 CHAIRS

When you are planning to move, the old space has a way of becoming a transient dumping ground of disorganized chaos. The new space, in my mind, is a clean and pristine canvas in which to take our time with to get just right. perfect. organized and color coded. clutter free.

In my mind, there is no way the new space could ever take on the disorganization that exists in the old. nope. no way.

We have the luxuriously wonderful luxury of overlapping our time in the old space while taking on the new. I have visions of taking items over one at a time. I am planning to have the painting and electric work and construction work done before we take any items over. It is a fabulous idea.

That being said, I have been collecting treasures for the new space. These treasures are piled high; stacked up on each other. Over the past months I have collected 11 chairs. 4 antique, french dining chairs. an antique, Balinese deck chair. 2 ultra modern, Knoll chairs. a Chinese Chippendale chair covered in burnt-orange velvet. 2 tiger striped, club chairs and a basic, black desk chair. A little bit of everything and I love them all.

There is absolutely no way they will all physically fit in the new space. Style-wise they most certainly will not work in the new space. nope. no way. It would be hideous.

Chris is a trooper and only very silently rolled his eyes as each new chair was delivered and unpacked. He helped push the chairs against the wall to keep enough room in the current space for us to walk. There isn't much space left. He hasn't even seen the Chinese Chippendale yet; it was just delivered tonight...

It is time to pick a design style and stick to it. I can store the chairs that don't make the cut or I can open a chair store.

11 chairs

CLICK THEM AND THEY GET BIGGER!

My 35th Birthday!









































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GLYNWOOD

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POLO SEASON BEGINS!

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and some more

click them and they get bigger...










































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NEW PICS FROM THE FARM

I am the happiest I have ever been. the only thing missing from these photos is Chris. Next time, he will hopefully be there too!

CLICK THEM AND THEY GET BIGGER










































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DEXTER

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MY DARLING DEXTER

my darling Dexter is in heaven now.

Chris and I took Dexter to the vet this morning and after a long battle with Diabetes and kidney failure, decided it was time. Dexter decided as well. We had an agreement that he would tell me when he was ready. When I woke up this morning, he was staring at me. The past week was difficult for Dexter. He had trouble walking and lost all interest in food. He was not suffering, but his quality of life had declined rapidly enough that I have been sick with worry.

One of the most incredible things about Dexter is how regal he was. He was a proud cat. I placed his favorite blanket on the exam table and he walked out of his carry-case and snuggled down on it. He crossed his front paws and started to purr in a heavy and labored way. We cuddled and he let out a silent meow that told me, for certain, that he was ready. He wasn't scared, just tired and drained.

Dr. Pirotin (a wonderful cat specialist) gave him a tranquilizer and Dexter slipped into a deep sleep. I was nose to nose with Dexter as his tired little body let go. I was the last thing he saw.

We wrapped Dexter up in his blanket and sat with him for a few minutes before the vet gave him his final shot. Dexter has been getting 2 or 3 injections a day for the last 8 years. It was relief to know this was his final injection and I explained there would be no more shots in heaven.

Dexter's breathing slowly stopped. He was wrapped up snuggly. Chris commented on how regal he looked; like the mummified Egyptian cats at the Metropolitan Museum. Dexter would like that.

NEW YORK MOMENT

to further boost my thoughts on New York, I want to share something that happened to me earlier today...

I was late for work and in the car service I take every morning down Fifth Avenue. The traffic was unusually high and we were at a complete standstill. The weather was close to perfect Spring temperature and I chose to get out of the car and walk the rest of the way, down Fifth, to my office on 44th Street.

I had walked about a block when I noticed a very sweet, black labrador retriever inhis golden years. His face was turning white and I figured he was about 10 years old.

His owner, was bundled up like it was single digits on the thermometer. I didn't really care to look closely at the owner, as his dog caught my fancy, not him or his strange get-up. We stood on the corner and chatted about dogs and Central Park when the man produced an orange from his pocket, peeled it (putting the peels back in his pocket) and proceeded to eat one piece and share the next piece with his trusted friend. It was very sweet and the dog happily sat, shook hands and caught his orange slices in mid air. His owner was all too thrilled to show off his well trained, albeit spoiled, dog.

I had to get going and excused myself to continue my scurry down Fifth. I looked up, as I stepped off the curb and tripped. I recognized the hooded gentleman well. Upon witnessing my recognition of him, and my flubbed attempt to apologize for not doing so earlier, he raised his finger to his mouth and went "Sshhhhhh" .... I squinted as I didn't understand what he meant. He pointed to a small group of paparazzi-esque photographers hovered outside a green awning about 50 feet away.

He said, "see those guys over there? well they are waiting for me and they think I am still inside. I snuck out the service door. I am dressed like this so they won't recognize me .... clearly it worked. And now my dog loving friend, I am going to the park to share another orange with Sam and let him run around a bit."

I smiled and walked away.

I love New York.

New York

New York is the city I call home. When things seem rough and aren't going my way, this city is a kicker. It rolls you up, chews on you and spits you out with absolutely no thought or remorse about it. Those times are hideously painful and exhausting.

That being said, when things are grooving and going my way, this city is glorious. It is beautiful and I easily get caught in the wonderful web and coast through my days. Just when I think I couldn't love her more, I am reminded that my love for New York is a constant and growing thing. It doesn't cap out. It is endless.

I am in my groove. It is euphoric to walk these streets loving every inch of them. It makes all the less magical moments, even the awful moments, worth while.

----

“I love New York because we order pizza from the Italian place across the street and have our laundry delivered. We take a taxi to the gym. We know exactly what we want out of life and careers, but can’t decide where to eat brunch. We make plans and don’t keep any of them. We think a studio for $1,500 a month is a steal, but get pissed when the coffee guy raises his prices 25 cents. We fight with cabbies about their driving skills, but we are 35 and have never had a driver’s license.”
—Alexis DeSieno

from New York Magazine

BACK FROM PARADISE TO AN ENTIRELY NEW ONE...

CLICK IT AND IT GETS BIGGER




















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holiday

I AM OFF TO THE GRENADINES FOR 10 DAYS!!

MY PERSONAL DICTIONARY...

SNORGGLE: To kiss and breathe in puppy or kitty breath. To be a "snorggle" the kissing and breathing must be kept to the triangular snoot area of said animal

SNARF: To eat or drink quickly

SNARFLY: A general term for how good one feels after eating or drinking something craved

SANTA SACK: To hork (see below) a large parcel or group of parcels over a single shoulder

HORK: A general term for throwing, heaving or tossing something

THE WRAPPER: My bed. Other beds can gain the term of "wrapper" after serious investigation

NUGGIFY: The process of a puppy or kitty getting comfortable enough to take a nap

MY VOTE

I can't vote in this country, but if I could .... I would have voted for Hillary today!

I will be asleep before Super Tuesday is over, I hope tomorrow morning when I wake up and fetch the paper from my door that Hillary is on the front page! ...

in and out...

I am hard-wired to blog in and out accordingly...

my hardware wears down with my happy passing days. I grow softer. I can't help it. My need to blog grows dim

My mother always told me there is a certain gentleman out there and he has been looking for me.

Back then, I didn't really believe her. I wanted to think it and believe it and I did. She always knew; I was wrong. it just didn't fit. I was trying to fit in.

This certain gentleman and I found each other. it is easy to leave it at just that

ME AGAIN ... in about

4 weeks (and counting)... The Grenadines




















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lights of my life...

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!

CANADA CHRISTMAS

MERRY CHRISTMAS

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!

"Happiness resides not in posessions and not in gold; the feeling of happiness dwells in the soul."

- Democritus

2007

- I turned 34
- Edith died
- I was hired for the job I always wanted
- I am debt free and saving
- Dexter and I shared his 20th year
- I gained 10 pounds
- I have long hair
- I try not to swear
- a bad opinion does not matter
- a good opinion is sacred
- my great friends have incredible children
- a broken nose didn't stop me
- I wasn't ready to give up my 4 walls
- I drove around Mexico without power steering
- I snorggled snoots and snouts
- I love New York more
- I strive to be a lady and not a girl
- I don't receive paper statements anymore
- I welcome wrinkles
- and freckles

BEGIN

I was down south for the last couple of weeks on a photo shoot. Before that, I was able to sneak away for a long weekend in the Bahamas. I came home and feel happily overwhelmed with Christmas. Being in 85 degree weather and working weeks with no time off, I didn't feel festive until I got back to snowy NYC!

I feel festive now and I love it!

I am heading North next week for a few days in Canada so I didn't put my suitcase away. It has been a permanent fixture in my living room for the last couple of months. There is no point in putting away, when I will need it so soon.

Dexter turned 20 a couple of weeks ago! He is my true miracle kitty. I bought him some wheat grass today and he gnawed off a bunch of it and is now fast asleep on my bed. Last year at this time, his prognosis was not good. I am thrilled that he is doing so well and I shared another year with him.

It has been an incredible year for me. Many things that seemed far away in years past, are now a part of me. I am learning to balance everything and have found the groove I seemed to skip over in the past. There were many times that I thought things wouldn't groove, but I know now that everything has led me to where I am and who I am now

“I awoke this morning with devout thanksgiving for my friends, the old and new”

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

SICK ILL NESS

I have not been feeling well. I was home sick last week for 2 days. They were defunct days to my office, but most precious to my health

my well being

the office cared less. I did my job and cradled myslef to sleep with a huge cough

Today, I was feeling amazing, until side swiped

cough it up and snot down

CRASH TEST

I walked to Grand Central Station to get a taxi this evening. I got in and as soon as my driver hit the gas, he ripped the door off of a van. The driver of the van did not look to see if he was opening his door into traffic. The windows shattered all over me and I was immediately thankful that we weren't going faster.

The 2 drivers had it out and both realized a police report was necessary as the damage to both vehicles was significant. I wanted to get out and leave, but I remained at the scene as a witness. 45 minutes later, the police arrived to write a report. I am so happy I stayed because the cops wanted to pin the accident on my driver when it was clearly not his fault. It was a minor hiccup in a usual NY day. When all paperwork had been filled out and the yelling stopped, the driver of my taxi drove me home and refused any money from me. He was so thankful that I remained as a witness. He was so kind even when the police weren't being kind.

I struggle with the hassle of this city, but I love it enough to take it as it comes. If I had left the scene of this accident, the truth would not be known and I would be a bad New Yorker

PERFECT SNOOT FOR SNORGGLING

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today

every now and then a day presents itself with so many emotions that it gives me a headache. Today would be a good example of this.

The headache is a painful thing, but all of the emotions are good to feel; even the bad ones. In order to appreciate the good, I need to feel the not-so-good. I get that and am happy I get it. Otherwise, I wouldn't get headaches because everything would be beige. I wouldn't feel anything if I lacked the level of emotion that lives inside of me.

That being said, I tend to take things personally at work when things don't go my way. I remember my First Grade report card.... "Mandy doesn't take well to criticism..." I would pout and suck my thumb...

These days, I don't get criticized, but my work does and I take it personally. I was a big mouth today and didn't accept that I was not given the opportunity to explain .... It worked in my favor. I am not 6 any more, but life-lessons have a way of following me around. It is personal, non-beige, feeling and hurting and it all happened today

MOON RIVER

I am always scared of swimming in a river because it is open-ended towards the sea. I much prefer to swim in a lake where I can see the shore from all sides.

A river just glides into the sea and that scares me

I BROKE THE CARDINAL RULE...

I broke the cardinal rule this evening when I got home and plopped my coat and scarf on top of the Gazelle. The Gazelle is not a clothes hanging solution! I just forced myself to hang my coat up properly and fold my scarf and put it in my scarf and glove drawer. I can be a creature of habit and must focus on not getting into habits that might be hard or impossible to break. I am certainly not the only Gazelle owner who subconsciously sees the device as a perfect garment rack; especially in the tight quarters of an apartment. That being said, I will be more aware tomorrow night when I get home and do everything in my power to avoid the plop of the coat and scarf on the Gazelle. I like the Gazelle, but it is currently on hiatus as it squeaks so loudly that I can't bare to work out on it. It sounds like nails on a chalk-board. WD40 is on my list of things to purchase this weekend. Perhaps when it is back in working order, I will be less prone to plopping things on it.

BOO

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WINTERIZATION of the WRAPPER and other stories...

... I received the new 5 inch feather-bed to put on top of my already delicious wrapper. It weighs 16 pounds and I stumbled trying to get it out of the box and into the cotton over-cover. I ricocheted off the gazelle and bounced over my laundry pile. I landed on a 15 pound pumpkin. This was just after getting home from standing in the rain for 30 minutes, with no umbrella, and a 45 minute cab ride. I peeled my wool sweater off; it smells like wet dog and is in my tub right now. I don't know what to do with it.

The end-all, be-all of adoptathon's is tomorrow at the ASPCA. I am supposed to be there right now setting up. I have to stuff Kongs and toilet-paper rolls with kitten treats... I may not make it there tonight, but will be there tomorrow.

TOOTHY SMILE

I went to the dentist yesterday. I have 2 dying roots, which will need disconnection in the future, but not yet.

Other than that, my smile is intact and according to my DDS, toothy. He said I have a toothy smile. Am I toothy? Have I been toothy all along? Apparently, each individual tooth in my mouth is a bit over-sized.

I am inventing a new definition for toothy tonight... I am "toothy", but it doesn't have to do with the size of each of my individual tooths. teeth. I much prefer to believe that "toothy" is an attitude; a way of life. more of a philosophy and less about a cosmetic definition of a smile. my smile

that is all I have to say about it

WILD FIRE

I am watching the coverage of the wild fires, which happen to burn south of the California border, but the US media doesn't cover that portion of the fires....

and I am sad about it. I am amazed at the swift spread of the fire. The images are haunting and impending, yet they are also beautiful. Nature is beautiful even when it burns.

I am on-call with several disaster relief organizations and I regret tonight that my new full-time status keeps me from heading west. This is one of those iffy times when I wonder if I have made the right decisions. I called to voluntarily check myself out of deployment. After years of training and preparing to help during disaster, I scratched.

I don't really know what to feel right now; except that I might be on the wrong side of what is truly important

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APPLES and PUMPKINS... and today

I went through Central Park this morning and was shocked to see how green it still is! There were a few hints of Autumn, but nothing like I expected or wanted to see. No vibrant red's and yellow's. It looked very much like summer; which isn't a bad thing, but unexpected due to the date. It has been extremely warm, with only a couple of days of cool temperatures so far this season. I am not up-to-date on my tree expertise, but I think it is frost that prompts a tree to change color. NYC has had no frost. not even close. In fact, I have my AC on right now because it is so warm.

I have wanted to go apple and pumpkin picking, but my schedule has been so tight. I like the idea of picking with wool socks on and wearing a cozy sweater. In the last week, when I wear a sweater, I end up shedding it quickly.

I miss the crisp Autumn days in Canada. We would go picking as early as my birthday when I was a kid. It was colder in Los Angeles than it is here.

I love this picture of me, my sister, my dad and Tiffany! I miss Tiff so much when I see her in photographs. I can still see her in my mind bounding around that orchard. She enjoyed it more than any one of us!


















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and me at the studio today with Leopold!
















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SISTERS...

... in frocks

My sister is coming to NYC for business and I can't wait to see her.

In this photo it looks like she is ready to swoop up behind my head (and I am clueless). par for the course as the little sister...



















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THE VENTI SCHLEPP

It isn't Tall or Grande, it is VENTI....

I am constantly shuffling paper, computers, hard drives, cables to go with them etc. all over the place. I upgraded my LL Bean Boat-and-Tote from a Medium (Grande) to a Large (Venti) to facilitate my constant schlepp of things to and from the office and to and from photo shoots. and back again all over.

I thought myself savvy when I began FedExing boxes of stuff to myself at hotels, studios and locations. I was certain this would cut down on the need to Venti Schlepp. I was wrong. The need increased once I began FedExing to myself. This once remarkable find, only cleared more room in my boat-and-tote for more stuff; stuff that ended up in a shopping bag because it wouldn't fit in the tote. The schlepp now includes shopping bags and the tote. all of this is after Fedexing boxes (plural) to myself.

I am a bit of a pack rat and like to be prepared. I admit it. However, will there ever be a time when I can simply carry a wee tote and a wee pocket book with no additional stuff? is it in me?

BACK HOME

I am not a fan of LA. the city freaks me out; and not much freaks me out. I managed it all, but might sleep until Sunday

It's a wrap from LA...

heading home tomorrow a day early.












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LA

Whenever I am in Los Angeles, I wonder if I could live here. I find it to be a strange city. The weather is amazing right now .... warm and sunny during the day and cool (jacket cool) at night. I have the fireplace going in my hotel room, but I got a bit of a sunburn from shooting outside all day. It is a strange mix. I think I would really miss the magic of the changing of the seasons. LA feels like it is stuck between seasons and I am stuck between neighborhoods. I am in West Hollywood, but shooting in Pasadena for the next few days, before moving to a new location in Malibu. There is much going on in a single city. It might stress me out if I lived here.

THUMP THUMP THUMP

Thumper is one of my favorite Disney characters. He is the thumping Hare from Bambi. I have many Disney favorites. Watching Bambi always makes me cry so I don't watch very often.

I have a small dental issue. It feels like Thumper is thump, thump, thumping in my gums. I am dentist bound tomorrow morning before leaving for Los Angeles on Thursday.

working and packing is rough when you have Thumper in your teeth

LUNA-BELLE

I just received word that Luna is not doing well. She is with the team of Marine Biologists who know her best and who she knows best. She stopped feeding on her own and is under constant watch. My hope is for her full recovery so I can swim with her again. She is such an amazing creature. I don't speak Dolphin, but she certainly speaks Homo Sapien.











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DANA at....

the new family lake house. I haven't been yet, but am looking for Waldo when I do make it there. Only my sister would go boating in a mini skirt! notice the Indian Summer, Northern Ontario moon in the sky... there is nothing like the light in Canada in September. How I wish there was a way to do photo shoots up North. days are short, but the light is spectacular.















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DAY

I had one of those days that didn't stop. I couldn't get everything I needed to get done because each passing minute brought a new dilemma that needed to be addressed immediately. Meetings overlapped and the hours ticked by. I drank soup like it was cold water. I missed the meetings that had been scheduled for weeks. I didn't have the chance to re-schedule those meetings. I hate to hear disappointment in the voice of a colleague, but there is absolutely no way I could give more. I crawled home, amongst the traffic blocks because the UN is in session. I am tired and hungry and have a sore throat. I have knots in my neck. I love what I do, but realize it does take its toll on me. I love this city, but it takes a toll on me. I am vexed by the people who work like I do, and still find time for their personal lives. the gym, friends, cooking, cleaning etc. let alone, those who have families; babies, husbands etc. how do they manage it all?

are they my heroes or the very thing I never want to be or even could be because I don't have enough time?

after a hectic day where I didn't feel all that well, I question things

THE GAZELLE

The Gazelle is an info-mercial special. It is an exercise machine that I have wanted for many years. It looks like fun and its for a good cause, my body, so I finally ordered the damn thing. It arrived today in a huge box that weighs a ton. It took 2 strong men to get the box into my apartment. I cut off the tape and tore the box open to find The Gazelle in 6 thousand pieces. I had NO IDEA that I needed to put the bugger together! I quite enjoy do-it-yourself projects, but this is daunting. If my assembled Gazelle ends up looking anything like this picture, I will be surprised. Talk about exercise! brain exercise.


















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HORRIFIED

You learn something new every day ....

My electrician and my dad, were HORRIFIED to learn that I stuffed tin-foil all around my electric box to keep any water bugs from crawling in. I suppose I should have known that tin-foil would conduct electricity. In true Mandy-Klutz fashion, I was lucky to say the least. lucky indeed

34

my Birthday weekend is just half over... I love every moment of it












































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TIME LINE

It is an interesting exercise to document your life in years. It was difficult, to say the least! I started with High School graduation and worked up until now. At first, there were gaps of time that I couldn't totally recall what I was doing. where I lived. what I did for my birthday that year. I respond best to visuals, so I started to gather photos. I inked a graph and started filling in significant land marks in my time line. pets, jobs, hair-color, relationships etc.

It started to come together and then I would remember something totally forgotten about and I would have to start over. and then over again. and go back again.

The most important thing about doing this is I realized how colorful and interesting my life has been. It is a good time line and I am the only person who needs to feel that way about it. Many parts of it weren't easy, weren't even pleasant, but those times were the hardest to recall. Once I did remember the bits and pieces, it made it so great to ink in all the amazing things. the unique things. the once in a life-time things. the good and the uneasy things.

It is the eve of the eve of my 34th Birthday. I was born on a Friday. 34 years ago = 12,417 days = 297,840 hours = 17,870,400 minutes = 1,072,831,234 seconds.

my time line so far ....

AIR

I have my windows open and the loveliest air is wafting through my apartment. It is the perfect temperature. I turned off the ceiling fan and am enjoying the natural breeze. I feel a little bit congested and achey, but I will not fall ill without a fight. I have fresh sheets and army corners and can't wait to burrow into the wrapper for the night.

LIFE...

... continues to inspire me and startle me.

Today will always be a sad day for me and I fumbled through it. The thunder and lightning were so severe this afternoon that I am certain heaven was crying. The rain was so thick at one point that I couldn't see clearly out my windows. I didn't feel clear about anything and then, just like that, the storm passed and the sun came out. This morning seems far away. I haven't forgotten it, but it faded a bit.

the eve of

I always loved the eve of something. a holiday. a new year. graduation. moving on. stop

Tonight will always be the eve of something sad and tragic. I have yet to grasp hold of it because I don't think I know how to grasp something like this. it is and it was. it will be; a part of me. I let the faces go. I let the bodies go. I thought there was a way to let it go, but it still hurts

SATURDAY

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MINI ME

The purchase of my new Ipod prompted me to organize the thousands of files I have on my Mac's. There are thousands and thousands of files to sort through. I came across this picture of me... it is me, but mini.

I think, perhaps, I am two? if so, this was taken 32 years ago.




















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WEE MISS

I have a new Ipod! She is itty bitty and silver. She arrived just as Steve Jobs announced the launch of an entirely new line of Ipods. go figure.

go Apple

THE UNIVERSAL REMOTE CONTROL

For years, perhaps over a decade, I have struggled with my remote control situation. Each component has its own remote control. I even needed a remote control, separate from all the rest, to switch over to watch a DVD and in the past, to play video games. At any given time, I had upwards from 4 remote controls, sitting on my bed side table collecting dust and crumbs of stuff.

I took a big plunge yesterday and invested in my first Universal Remote Control. I struggled with the price tag, but figured if I could get the bugger to work, my life would be better. Simpler. Easier.

I inserted the batteries and unfolded, fold after fold after fold of the instruction manual and sat on my bed with it open like a big road map. It was daunting.

There were codes about codes. Codes for different components, made in different countries, with different languages. Codes for different companies, in different countries. There were codes about things I never thought code-worthy. I got out my highlighter and my sharp-ee marker and read the road map start to finish. I made notes about codes and highlighted the notes in color and component specific colors.

I am not the type of person to read the instructions. I much prefer to figure it out along the way; but in this instance, if I didn't get it correct out of the gate, I wasn't going to try again.

I punched in numbers and symbols and the appropriate codes. I followed the directions for each component and made sure I didn't punch in anything that wasn't required.

You can imagine my surprise and jubilant joy when I tested my coding and every single thing turned on and functioned with functions I didn't think were possible!

I placed all 5 of my old remote controls in my drawer last night. I slid into bed and turned on the cable box, my TV, my DVD and my speakers all at once. I bounced between the US Open, surround-sound and Old School on DVD. I played with the volume, the contrast, and the bass. AWESOME!

ELECTRICITY

I am spoiled with it. I am a grump without it. Half of my apartment lost power yesterday. My super, who had the weekend off, was here yesterday to investigate. he fixed it, a bit, and this morning, I was back to no power. I had an emergency electrician come in this afternoon. he firmed up my belief that I have a serious electric issue. He was unable to do anything about it on the sunday of a long weekend. he ripped off my electric panel and said I shouldn't be too concerned with fire.

shouldn't be concerned????

I bought a new fire extinguisher today as a precaution. I am going to sleep with it.

I just spent the last hour stuffing holes and niches with tin-foil. I don't want a water bug or the family of a water bug to move in because they suddenly have open access to my apartment. considering fire as the worst scenario, water bugs might be welcome.















.

UPDATE

I am writing to report that I did not win the mega millions jackpot as planned.

HAPPY LONG WEEKEND!

12.6 pounds

Dexter weighs 12.6 pounds. At one time, I called him The Quarter Pounder because he was almost 24 pounds. His swinging, bowling-ball stomach is no more. He is no longer chunky, but he is perfectly beautiful.

Tomorrow begins a long weekend for me. I opted out of tickets for the US Open. I opted out of the beach. I just want to be home within this city and my few walls. My new passport has yet to show, so I can't go to Canada. I might want to go, but opt out because every time I do go, I wonder more and more and more if I should move there and call it a day



















.

2 years

it seems like longer.

my life changed 2 years ago. i was at the US Open and not thinking much about anything. it was another US Open and the courts were blue instead of the green from years before.

then I saw this photo ....














and my life changed itself.